Peg Leg
Aye, two score years adrift ’round the watery world, and not three amidst spent complete on dry land.
Transhumeral Myoelectric U3+
It was late summer of ‘05. Bummer, too: Ending up missing Trey’s first solo tour.
Peg Leg
A maw like perdition’s great gate, ’twere. A reckonless spread, to swallow all history’s ceaseless sin, and, yet, still—cruelest mercy!—the great gate rings shut and clips one sinner, one man, one mote.
Transhumeral Myoelectric U3+
Well, I was an engineer, you know? So, I knew a bit about torque, and I knew the materials. I mean, I wasn’t gonna cut through bone with a Leatherman!
Peg Leg
Left me a poor, pegging lubber for ever and a day, the beast did.
Transhumeral Myoelectric U3+
Well, I wouldn’t say adrenalin “addict,” no. But, yeah, I’d been in close situations before. Survived an avalanche out near A-Basin once. Oh, and Gener’s pre-moe.down party! I made it through that. So, yeah, I guess I’m a risk taker!
Peg Leg
Aye, ’tis carved from ivory jaw, white as the fresh-shorn wool of our Nantucket sheep, white as my turbid wake, white as the massy form—the elusive form—that is my lance’s only home.
Transhumeral Myoelectric U3+
Yeah, check it: The wrist’ll rotate 360 degrees! I did this on The Late Show! He freaked.
Peg Leg
To be prophet and fulfiller one. To dismember my dismemberer.
Transhumeral Myoelectric U3+
I do really get a kick out of talking to the kids. First thing I tell ’em is, “Always leave a note!” Plus, I’ve still got one more high peak to do in a nighttime solo climb.
Peg Leg
Is money to be the measurer?! Accountants may gird the globe with guineas; My vengeance will fetch a great premium within my own maimed measure!
Transhumeral Myoelectric U3+
Well, I put a lot of it back into my foundation, but I usually, ballpark, about $20K to $25K a speech.
Peg Leg
My marital pillow has but the slightest dent; wed not till 40, and not but the one night ashore with my young girl-wife.
Transhumeral Myoelectric U3+
Well, yeah, actually. I’m dating a physical therapist. She’s cool. Sick mountain biker, too.
Peg Leg
Who is over me? Truth hath no confines! I would strike the sun if it insulted me!
Transhumeral Myoelectric U3+
Honestly, though, it was the best thing that ever happened to me. In a way, I was born that day.
Peg Leg
But, soft, no matter! Drink and pass, drink and pass! Long draughts—short swallows! Well done, almost drained!
Transhumeral Myoelectric U3+
You want one? It’s Magic Hat.
Peg Leg
So, can ye keep a sharp eye, and a sharp lance?
Transhumeral Myoelectric U3+
So, dude, have you done any climbing? Eh, you know what? Fuck it. Doesn’t matter. You would totally dig it. We should do this!
