Best Use of Public Funds
Troy Waterfront Park, education/schools, Alive at Five, fixing roads, CDTA, New York State Museum, snow removal, infrastructure/fixing roads, Central Park, environment, Livingston Avenie Pedestrian Bridge, state employees, Park Playhouse, revitalization of downtown Schenectady, Music Mobile, Tea Party patriots, ha, parking garages, the homeless, CNSE, Joseph L. Bruno Stadium, prosecuting Joseph L. Bruno.
Best Misuse of Public Funds
Albany Convention Center, charter schools, welfare, New York State Legislature, marijuana laws, Andrew Cuomo, Metroplex, everything OGS does, CNSE, casinos, NYRA, Albany County Legislature, Rensselaer County Legislature, Alan Chartock, snow removal in Troy, Joseph L. Bruno Stadium.
Best Way to Lure People to the Capital Region
Saratoga Race Course, lower taxes, Bombers, aquarium, Lake George, free tattoo removal, bike lanes, arts & entertainment, get rid of Cuomo, get rid of welfare, lie, high-speed rail, Alive at Five, historic housing, Adirondacks, jobs, better public transit, music, more brew pubs, monorail, beer.
Best Time to Be Had in the Capital Region for Under $10
New York State Museum, Adirondack hiking, Alive at Five, Washington Park, Thacher Park, Guptill’s Arena, Wolff’s Biergarten, Tri-City ValleyCats, classics movies at the Madison Theater, a pint at the Ruck, Park Playhouse, Corning Tower observation deck, Troy Night Out, Jumpin’ Jacks, Skeeter Creek show, Hoffman’s Playland, bocce courts in Troy’s Little Italy, watching drunks on St. Patrick’s Day.
Best Place to See and Be Seen
Saratoga Race Course, Alive at Five, Lucas Confectionary, McGeary’s, 1st Friday, brew pubs, Troy Night Out, bike paths, the Ruck, SPAC, Troy Farmers Market, Rockin’ on the River, Metroland’s I Saw U section, Washington Park, Westmere Beverage, Bogie’s, Nitty Gritty Slam.
Best Thing That Could Happen to Albany
Waterfront development, more live music, revitalize downtown, relaxed drinking laws, bury I-787 underground, Mayor Sev Statik, stop the oil bomb trains, Trader Joe’s, zoo or aquarium, payment-in-lieu-of-taxes program with New York state, potholes fixed, no casino, no convention center, money raining from the sky, food trucks in Washington Park, Sonic.
Best Thing That Could Happen to Troy
Collar City Ramble, movie theater, waterfront development, more places like Lucas Confectionary and Brown’s Brewing Company, get rid of potholes, get rid of Mayor Rosamilia, Jesus, Jeff Buell, more shopping, public dock, Antique Row revitalized, police reform, nuclear anihilation, free donuts every morning, Troycore, people leave Uncle Sam statues alone, Ferris wheel, people would realize how awesome it is, Troy is fine.
Best Thing That Could Happen to Schenectady
More jobs, more housing and parking downtown, Mexican Radio, more community services, less crime, redevelopment of Alco property, nuclear anihilation, more shopping downtown, Wolff’s Biergarten, lower taxes, light rail, more music venues, honest cops, not get mugged, more jobs at GE, the Earth will shift and move it closer to Albany, elect Roger Hull mayor, take the blue pill.
Best Thing That Could Happen to Saratoga Springs
Casino, no casino, more diversity, more parking, slow down, longer racing season, more country shows at SPAC, high-speed rail to Albany, ban horse racing, annex Wilton, yuppies fuck off back to the city, affordable housing, commuter rail, lose the elitist attitude, NASCAR track, horse parade down Caroline Street, homeless refuge camp, keep it the way it is.
Best Thing That Happened in 2013
Kathy Sheehan elected, Jerry Jennings retired, PearlPalooza, Farm Aid, First Night Saratoga, it ended, Lucas Confectionary opened, Starbucks in Troy, The Armory Show at the Opalka Gallery, we are still here, Pope Francis, Ed Weaver retired from The Record, Silversun Pickups at Tulip Fest, Rush at SPAC.
Best Reason To Live in the Capital Region
Centrally located, four seasons, Troy, arts & music scene, people, Lake George, family ties, diversity, beer, Saratoga, access to the Adirondacks, less snow than central and western New York, history, quality of life, live music, beautiful landscape, summer, because you were born here.
Best-Kept Secret in the Capital Region
Leah’s Cakery in Round Lake, Amsterdam Municipal Golf Course, Shmaltz Brewing Company, Troy, the Ruck, USS Slater, The Bears’ Restaurant in Duanesburg, Caffe Italia, 20 North Broadway in Schenectady, Albany All Stars Roller Derby, Burdon Iron Works Museum, Nick Bisanz, it’s a secret.
Best Local Celebrity You’d Like to Date
Buddy Cocker from Skeeter Creek, Benita Zahn, Matt Baumgartner, Jessica Layton, Anthony Fallacaro, Ryan McCalla, Erin Harkes, Duncan Crary, Subrina Dhammi, Mike Thomas, Steve Caporizzo, January Keaton, Julie Chapman, Mike Feurstein, Billy Fucillo [editor’s note: not really local], Rachael Ray (emeritus), Megyn Kelly (ditto), none—I love my boyfriend, we have celebrities?
Best ____ (add your own category)
Best Cuban-American Restaurant: Carmen’s Café in Troy, Best Poetry Open Mic: Third Thursdays at Albany’s Social Justice Center, Best Music Collective: Built4BBQ.com, Best Community Organization: Troy Bike Rescue, Best Beverage Center (beer selection): Oliver’s in Albany, Best Wings Anywhere: Duff’s Famous Wings in Buffalo [editor’s note: GTFO], Best BID: Downtown Troy, Best Local Sports Team: U.S. Water Ski Show Team in Scotia, Best Local Sports Team: Albany All Stars Roller Derby.