many people believe that a vanilla type and a kinkster can
never live happily ever after. Others are convinced that anonymous
Internet hookups always end in tears and positive HPV test
results. Where do people get these false impressions? Reading
columns like mine. Contented couples—twosomes who have successfully
incorporated one partner’s kinks, Internet hookups that stay
hooked—don’t need my advice. To counter the false impression
created by my column, I invited contented kinksters and happily
partnered sluts to send in their happy-ending stories.
Last week, we heard from straight readers; this week, gay,
lesbian, bi, and trans readers share their happy endings.
I was an inexperienced 19-year-old girl from the suburbs.
After dating for a few months, my boyfriend told me that he
was bi. I freaked out. I struggled with the normal question:
Is he gay? But my boyfriend was extremely open and honest,
we had a great sex life, and I loved him—so I decided to see
where this would go.
About a year later, we started fooling around with other guys
(my idea), mostly bi guys who gave us equal attention. It’s
the hottest thing ever. I was young when we got together and
so I’m enjoying playing around a bit, and it turns out that
he has a bit of a cuckold fetish. This has brought us closer
and helped us let go of all inhibition during “normal”
I am marrying the amazing bi guy with a cuckold fetish and
I couldn’t be happier.
Love With A Kinky Motherfucker
I’m a submissive gay boy. I tried dating vanilla tops, but
it didn’t work. One night, I initiated a conversation at a
club with Mr. Nice. I was actually cruising Mr. Nice’s friend,
because his friend looked more hardcore—shaved head, torn
jeans, leather jacket. Mr. Hardcore turned out to be Mr. Vanilla.
I was disappointed, but I enjoyed the company of Mr. Nice
so we occasionally hooked up for vanilla sex. It didn’t work
when he tried being dominant, so I had some one-off dates
with experienced dominants.
About a year later, Mr. Nice decided to do sex work—as a professional
dominant. Learning “on the job,” Mr. Nice transformed himself
into Mr. Raunch. And last month, in front of a group of close
friends, we celebrated our four-year union—as Master and servant.
darling husband came out to me a few years ago: He wanted
to be a woman, but didn’t want to lose me, his wife. We’re
still together after all of it—happy and loving, and still
enjoying each other sexually. I hope all your success stories
involve even half the affection and fun that we have together.
Sign me . . .
I was a “bathhouse Billy.” At least three nights a week, I
went to the gay bathhouses and took on an awful lot of men.
There was one guy I saw at the baths all the time who was
so painfully shy he hardly ever came out of the locker room.
One day I went to visit a friend and who should open the door?
Mr. Shy. I asked him out. One thing led to another and we
moved in together. It has been 30 years now. He changed me
. . .
A Billy But Only At Home
I used to be incredibly embarrassed by my foot fetish. But
the four wonderful guys I’ve dated during my relatively short
28 years on earth have gone out of their way to reassure me
that it turns them on to see me turned on. Now I make no apologies
and I make sure to do what I can to turn on my boyfriends
and hookups. Sex is so much better now that I’ve relinquished
I’m femme, she’s butch, we’re dykes. Before we met, my “husband”
had ended a sexless relationship of many years and knew she
wanted to be more true to her passionate sexual self, but
had never considered even the mildest BDSM. I brought up the
subject of my ordinary kinks (spanking, daddy/girl role-playing),
and she responded like any good lesbian feminist. We talked—a
lot. She didn’t want to hurt me, be violent, or act out artificial
roles. I questioned whether BDSM had been an unhealthy substitute
for intimacy in my previous relationships and might be unnecessary
in the context of our new profound love. She questioned her
resistance to doing things that would get me wet.
Eight months later, she spanked me for the first time. Then
she started referring to herself as “Daddy” while fucking
and spanking me. We don’t only have kinky sex, but we have
plenty of it. We had a big wedding and we’re living happily
ever after. I might have married her even if she wasn’t so
GGG, but the self-examination, self-disclosure, and risk taking
we’ve done around my kinks has been a very significant, possibly
essential, part of the intimacy we’ve created.
first boyfriend and I were together for three years. It wasn’t
a great relationship—we weren’t compatible, he cheated, we
fought—but I was too scared to DTMFA. Finally, he dumped me
for someone else. We continued to live together, which made
it hard to resist continuing to have sex, which created lots
of gay drama. Eventually I moved out, met someone else, and
began the relationship of my dreams.
That’s a happy ending, but where’s the dirty part, you ask.
Well, after I moved out, I didn’t talk to my ex for months.
He broke up with the guy that he had dumped me for and started
seeing someone new (and much better for him). We gradually
started talking and hanging out again, he got to know my fantastic
new boyfriend, and I got to know his, and the four of us are
now great friends. One weekend we took a trip to a nearby
big city, got a hotel room, and consummated the friendship
with an intense, several-hours-long fourgy. An entire bottle
of lube was used, and after our final moans and grunts, we
heard clapping from the hallway.
I met my boyfriend on manhunt.net. We corresponded for a month
before meeting, because we were both out of town. I was so
anxious that somebody else was going to get that hot piece
of ass before me. When we met the first time, we hooked up
that same afternoon. Now we share a home—I cook, he cleans—and
he’s introduced me to his family. Not to mention I get to
pound his hole every day. Despite how we met, he’s the best
partner I’ve ever had: understanding, loyal, and too cute
All the queer happy endings that didn’t fit in the column
can be found at http://www.thestranger.com/savage/homohappyendings.
Next week, we return to our regularly scheduled programming:
unhappy endings, hookup disasters, and my very special brand
of sometimes spectacularly unhelpful advice.
A new Savage Love podcast is available for download every
Tuesday at www.thestranger.com/savage.