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| Photo:
Alicia Solsman |
Personal
Touches
Get
creative, and have a wedding everybody will remember
By
Amy Halloran
Every wedding is part of a continuum, an imaginary wedding
march, if you will, of couples stretching back through the
history of legal mating. Yet each wedding also belongs solely
to the particular pair involved. How can you respect traditions
and also keep your wedding yours?
Creativity is the key. Sage graduate Karen McMahon and her
husband chose the Rosamond Gifford Zoo in Syracuse for their
ceremony and reception. The couple wanted an outdoor wedding
and liked supporting the zoo. Guests were given eco-chocolate
treats as favors, and got to mingle with the animals during
cocktail hour.
Aquariums and natural history museums make great locations,
too. Couples marry under sea turtles and the yawning maws
of dinosaurs. If you choose such a site, however, make sure
the terms of use are clear; a wedding at an art museum had
an unexpected twist because guests were not allowed access
to the galleries, as the couple had assumed would be the case.
People who are in love with the outdoors often find great
ways to show their love for each other. Mountaintop weddings
with the wedding party and guests in full ski gear are not
as rare as you might think. Big snow machines can bring those
intimidated by the chairlift to the ceremony. Hikers could
draw dedicated pals to a favorite peak; there are plenty of
officiants ready to literally go the extra mile. One couple
married at a summer camp. Guests stayed in bunks and the wedding
weekend was full of activities like waterskiing, softball
and tennis.
Boats are a classic place to get married, but how about a
boat on the Erie Canal, or a trip on the Battenkill railroad?
Beaches are beautiful settings, and at least one adventurous
couple got married at 7 AM, and served guests a breakfast
buffet.
What if the great indoors appeals to you? Think of what you
love to do with your love, and build your wedding around that.
A couple crazy for classic films had a graphic designer use
their images and names on a reprise of an It’s a Wonderful
Life poster; the design was used for the invitation, where
guests were asked to wear black and white.
Ecologically minded foodies might choose a palate of locally
grown foods for the first meal they share with family and
friends. The truly devoted might ask their favorite farmer
to host the ceremony and festivities. Since wedding season
conflicts with the harvest, that might be the only way to
get your farmer to attend. There are rural wedding sites,
however, already manicured and primed to present the spectacle
of a wedding.
Weddings are a kind of theater. There is a script of rituals
you can incorporate into what you do, or you can write the
entire day from scratch and set the stage for your shared
life. My husband is involved with dance theater, so he took
this thought to heart. We had a small ceremony, and two receptions,
a picnic at Grafton State Park for my family and friends,
and an audience participation play in our Seattle backyard.
A friend ignited effigies of our single selves, and we crowned
each other king and queen of our hearts.
However, if you and your mate are interested in a standard
celebration, there are lots of little ways to go wild. Put
cookie cutters or G.I. Joes on top of your wedding cake. Give
your guests bath treats and massage oil for danced-out feet.
Give gag toys, as one Albany couple did. Artifacts keep surfacing
in my house: a taped together whoopee cushion, popping rubber
toys that jumped behind the fridge.
Personalized printed matter, such as a romance novel starring
the bride and groom, newspaper templates ready for customization,
or wedding programs studded with details about the couple,
are just a click away. A couple of newspaper reporters made
a special edition for their wedding, filled with stories penned
by writer friends, and the document has been spied years later
on friends’ bookshelves.
Invitations and centerpieces are other areas where you can
easily stray from the norm. How about making wedding tickets
for invitations? Fully functioning piñatas decorated tables
at a Seattle wedding. Fortune cookies can be filled with individualized
messages. Forsake the multi-tiered wedding cake and offer
a stack of glass jars full of candy.
The theme common to these variations is personalization. All
the elements of a wedding—location, vows, food, favors, outfits—can
be specialized to become emblems of the people involved rather
than representations of a model. If you can take liberties
with the form, do. Your efforts will stand up in people’s
memories, a document to the commitment you are asking your
guests to witness.
My sister speaks fondly of one wedding. People got to know
each other while staying at the bed-and-breakfast where the
wedding and reception were held. There was no military timing
to events. The weekend felt like it was about the people gathered,
not just the couple. And that, I think, is a truly creative
achievement.
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