am a woman in a relatively new relationship. Prior to this
guy, I had a deep disgust for anything anal-related. After
some dedicated work and anilingus on his part, he’s helped
me overcome my fears of the “grossness” of the area and made
me an enthusiastic convert—as a recipient.
He has expressed an interest in me reciprocating in butt play
and rimming. I know it’s a sensitive area for him and would
bring him a lot of pleasure—but no matter how much he cleans
the area, I’m having trouble getting over two issues.
1. I’m submissive and prefer my partners to be dominant. Butt
play on him would ruin his “dominant” role for me. However,
that problem is minor compared to . . .
2. He is overweight and hairy, and no amount of cleaning dispels
the musk from that area for more than five minutes. When I’m
going down on him, I deal, as it isn’t too bad and some amount
of genital smell is to be expected. But moving further into
his butt area—which is pretty darn huge, hairy, and flabby—would
require burying my face in the smelliest and least attractive
area of his body.
I feel horrible about this. Removing the hair would not be
enough to give his butt a shape and remove the extra mass
that’s trapping and producing the odors. I feel it’s too horrible
to tell him, “I would probably do it if you dropped 50 pounds.”
It’s also not fair, as he’s an enthusiastic anal giver (though
if not giving means never receiving, I’m willing to go without).
How do I get over this, Dan? Aside from this issue, our sex
life is fantastic. I truly am attracted to him, just not his
butt. I want to be GGG, but this is really pushing my limits.
don’t know how you get over it, CGT—hell, I don’t think I’ll
ever get over just reading your letter.
I recognize, of course, that anal pleasure, however it’s administered,
isn’t just for butts on the men’s Australian Olympic diving
team. Butts come in all different sizes, shapes, and flavors,
and not every butt looks as good in a Speedo or—presumably—tastes
as good out of a Speedo as, say, Matthew Mitcham’s butt does.
And, hey, reciprocity makes the orgasms go round. But there
are times when there’s just no getting over something and
a face-saving white lie is in order.
Tell him that, as much as you appreciate his efforts to open
you up—figuratively and literally—to being on the receiving
end of butt play, you don’t think you’ll ever get over your
hang-up about being on the giving end. He doesn’t need to
know that you might feel differently if Matthew Mitcham had
asked you to eat his tiny, tight, and thoroughly chlorinated
little butt, CGT, so feel free to leave that bit out. End
by telling him that you’ll understand if he no longer wishes
to indulge you in the butt play that, thanks to his efforts,
you’ve come to enjoy so much.
a straight 22-year-old male. I have a skin-picking fetish.
I get off on picking scabs and patches of dry skin. I also
have seborrhoeic dermatitis, a condition that causes flaky,
white patches of dry skin to grow on my scalp. I pick all
the scales off my scalp daily. I masturbate afterward and
have had some of the best orgasms of my life this way.
My problem: Every girlfriend I’ve ever opened up to about
this has been grossed out. None of my girlfriends have been
willing to indulge my fetish, even after I’ve been willing
to indulge their kinks. They tell me it is unclean or dangerous.
Even paid escorts have refused to pick my scalp for me. A
woman picking my scalp while I jerk off is my biggest fantasy.
Surely there must be a scab-picking girl out there for me.
How do I find her?
Kinkest In Need
going to be that kind of column—the kind you don’t write over
lunch. (My apologies to anyone who’s reading this over lunch.)
Your fetish—which, according to the interwebs, goes by the
name “phaneromania”—is a blessedly uncommon fetish, SKIN,
as well as a pretty high bar to clear. Picking the scabs off
someone’s scalp while he beats off isn’t something that even
the most open-minded, sexually adventurous partner would regard
as a GGG-related responsibility.
Don’t lose hope, SKIN. While there are always more men into
a given fetish than there are women, fetishes that involve
medical and/or physical maladies tend to tap women at slightly
higher rates than other fetishes. It’s the caregiver/nurturer
thing taken to a sixy extreme (sick + sexy = sixy).
Keep putting yourself out there, keep being open with the
women you date about your ultimate turn-on, and you may hit
the sixy jackoffpot. Your only other hope is enough:
You’ll have to meet a woman who loves you enough to do this
for you or you’ll have to pay a woman enough to do this for
a 34-year-old openly gay white-collar professional man in
an open relationship with my amazing boyfriend of nine years.
I’ve been getting fucked on the side for the past two years
by a 30-year-old closeted bisexual total-top white blue-collar
steelworker. Although we have very different backgrounds,
we both have a great time when his eight-inch cock is in me.
He texts me when he’s horny, I show up, I blow him, he pounds
my brains out and ejaculates, and I leave (all safely, of
course). Maybe a little chitchat after. He seems like a nice
guy, and it’s a NSA attachment that works well.
The issue: I’m afraid he may be a white supremacist. While
he has never said anything to me, he has numerous tattoos,
including the infamous “88” tattoo (which usually refers to
“Heil Hitler,” with H being the eighth letter of the alphabet).
Additionally, I’ve seen some paramilitary-type stuff around
his place. He’s never said anything bigoted about minorities,
and we’ve never discussed it. He obviously has no problem
with gay guys—he knows I’m open and out—and I don’t think
he’s planning for RaHoWa, but I’m wondering about the tattoos
and am afraid to ask.
Do I have to give up his eight-inch blue-collar cock and our
no-strings slam sessions because he may hold ideas I find
Over Racist Dick
me intolerant, but I don’t think a member of one oppressed
minority group—that would be you, WORD—should be bouncing
on the dick of someone who endorses hatred directed at members
of other minority groups.
Which means you will have to give up those hot slam sessions—but
only if this dude is a racist and/or anti-Semitic piece
Doesn’t that 88 tattoo prove that he’s a POS? Not necessarily.
It only proves that he was a POS at the time he got the tattoo.
Hatred can fade and people can become more tolerant, but tattoos
are forever. He may be ashamed of that tattoo and planning
to get it inked over—but you won’t know until you ask.
And you should ask, WORD, and if turns out he’s still a racist
and/or anti-Semitic POS, you shouldn’t see him anymore.
HEY, EVERYBODY: Do me a favor. Go to tinyurl.com/24rjpv7.
Find “Colleen K.” Click “View profile.” Click “Like this.”
Find the Savage Lovecast (my weekly podcast) every Tuesday